Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
