he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
