Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
She needs sedatives and a leash
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
