Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I currently don't understand fingers.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
