He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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