My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Randomize
