a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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