rhymes with "ouble enetration"
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize