I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
