I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Randomize
