I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Randomize
