Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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