Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Randomize
