You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
