I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
