they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
We had sex on a dog bed..
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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