why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
