i wish peter jackson would direct porn
it was like eating out sand paper
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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