Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Randomize