I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I need to sanitize my soul.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
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