she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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