you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize