Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Let's get the cat blown out
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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