your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
