you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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