Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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