But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
