Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
