what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize