Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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