She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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