he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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