I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
why is half of my head shaved?
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