it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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