her facebook's as public as her vagina
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
All the doctor said was why
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
