why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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