gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
