i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
