i just google imaged poop.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize
