stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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