Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
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