The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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