it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
