like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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