Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
