if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
my liver is dry heaving
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
