your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
