She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
