I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
