dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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