i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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